Deep Breath 
2003 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance
Sometime in early May, some of my friends and I were invited to a party. We decided to go, and once there we had a pretty good time. Unfortunaty, a poor mix of marajuana, tequila and a lack of good judgment lead to the untimely death of the host of the party.
It seems that it began to head south when we went into his backyard and he was standing on the diving board (extremely drunk), boasting that he could hold his breath longer than anyone here. Unfortunately, he found his body too bouyant, and he couldnt remain under for very long with his lungs full of air. So he made his first bad decision by chaining himself (on the side of the pool) to a lead weight from his exercise bench.
He made his second bad decision by having his friend drop the weights into the pool.
He made his third bad decision, by remembering that he had left the keys to the lock inside the house.
Enter Darwin.
Perhaps it was that they were all too drunk.
Perhaps it was that no one was timing him.
But, for whatever the reason, everyone standing at the edge of the pool failed to notice their host had remained underwater for a good ten minutes. When someone finally said, "Duude! He's been under for-ever maan!"
y friend was that person. When I (being sober) heard these words, I knew it was time to call an ambulence.
I beleive there is a moral here.
"Dont be a dumbass." Submitted on 05/22/2003
Submitted by:
Kyle Chapman
Reference:
Copyright © 2002 DarwinAwards.com
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