I just fixed the fence ... 
2003 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance
I was actually wittness to this one. It *may* be in the police register of the Monte Rio police sub-station or the CHIPs files for 1993 or 4, however I have been unable to verify.
There is a senic stretch of highway 116 through the town of Monte Rio, California on the Russian River. The road curves into a series of twists and sharp turns around giant redwoods on either side of the highway. A sign at the entrance of this stretch --well lit with flashing yellow lights -- warns "sharp cerves ahead" and to proceed with caution. A picturesque log fence stands along one side of the road. If a driver takes the first curve too fast, he or she will suddenly be confronted with major automotive repair bills as s/he climbs out from twisted metal and the fence. The fence has claimed many a tourist over the years. The bill for fixing it four or five times every summer tourist season was getting to the owner, util the local CHIPS officers (highway patrol) "chipped in" and fixed it for him.
Life was good, until one night the fence owner went off to the "Pink Elephant" -- a true dive -- in downtown Monte Rio for a beer or six. On the way home, he suddenly found himself rounding the car eating curves a little faster than safe and heading straight into his brand new fence! Thinking fast, he swerved and smacked his truck into a utility pole. The pole broke. So did the pick-up, and so were an arm and a leg of the driver. While recovering (he did recover, disqualifying him for the Darwin Award - at least this time) he was asked why he hit the utility pole , "I just had the g-dd---m fence fixed!" Submitted on 03/14/2003
Submitted by:
Anonymous
Reference:
None ...
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