Campfire Fun 
2003 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance
While camping out at a designated off-road vehicle wilderness area called McLean Creek (near Calgary AB Canada), I was witness to the most idiotic episode.
The community of hellions in this area had developed a unique way of passing their drunkin' nights by the campfire.
After finishing their 1 litre bottles of Big Bear Beer, they would fill the bottles between 1/4 to 2/3 the way with gas, put a piece of hot dog into the bottle, and tighten the aluminum twist cap about 3/4 the way on. Then they would stick the bottle into the middle of the campfire - facing straight up.
This happened many, many times over the course of weekend bender.
One of three things usually happens: The least dramatic of which is the bottle cracks and there is a puff of flames as the fuel uneventfully leaks into the fire and ignites. The intended effect was for the fuel to start boiling, pushing the piece of hot dog up to the top of the cap, where when enough pressure builds the caps blows off sending a flaming plume up into the air about 10 metres (30 feet). Seconds later the bottle flame thrower flares itself out - with a huge round of cheers resulting from the on-looking crowd of backwoods delinquents. Now the third and most dangerous effect happens if the cap is put on a bit too tight. In this case, too much pressure builds in the bottle until it violently explodes sending shards of glass and flaming fuel off in all directions in a wide radius.
Needless to say, even the slowest of morons tends to retreat behind a large tree to observe these happens.
Ok - this brings us to about 6am one morning - a semi-coherent group is still up and drunk from the previous evenings festivities - when two teenage ruffians decide in their infinite wisdom to do a double whammy! So both of these blokes fills a bottle - and sticks it into the fire. Minutes later the first one partially blows up, tipping the other bottle over so that it is now facing towards their prized trucks. Our nominee runs over to the fire, and using a stick attempts to right the fallen boiling bottle. Unfortunately, as soon as he touches the bottle it blows up in his face - covering him with burning fuel and glass. He turns around stunned, his face and hands charred and flaming with many visible cuts bleeding all over him. A large chunk of glass can be seen protruding from his neck - dangerously close to this jugular. Standing there his hair, beard, and clothes still on fire, he whimpers to his shocked friends, "What do I do?! What do I do!?"
Girls screaming, guys panicking - finally they're able to get the fire out, but every one knew this guy was in pretty bad shape. After minor first aid, the consensus is to get him into one of the trucks and the hell outta there as fast as possible. Luckily, as they arrived at the main connection road out of the camp, the vehicle met up with the park warden - who immediately called AirVac. Half an hour later the boy is in the helicopter and on his way to Calgary's Foothills Hospital.
Everyone was pretty upset the rest of the day. People moped around in groups discussing what happened to their poor friend - trying to reassure themselves of the horrors earlier in the day. Then later on in the afternoon, the boy's father and a family friend arrived to collect his son's vehicle. Everyone looked on with solemn guilt as the boy's vehicle was driven away. Luckily word was he was in stable although critical condition with 3rd degree burns on a third of his body and numerous serious lacerations.
I remember talking with the other boy who made the bottle as the boy's truck was leaving, and he said to me, "That's it - I'm NEVER making one of those again - NEVER!"
Amazingly, THAT very night the festivities roared right back up again – the memory and guilt of their injured friend gone up in plumes of fuel.
I’ve never been back since.
Submitted on 01/25/2003
Submitted by:
Michael Morel
Reference:
Copyright © 2002 DarwinAwards.com
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