Yet another FBIP 
2003 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance
While reading "The Darwin Awards II" I came to the account entitled "Tube Snake" and read the comments concerning the trouble people have believing such accounts. It would appear that such behavior is neither all that uncommon nor at all unbelievable.
I have been a firefighter/paramedic for almost 30 years now and have come to discribe what I do for a living as "Desperately fighting the forces of natural selection." One example of this occured a few years ago when we were called to a "Request for aid. No further details." Upon arrival we found a man in his early 30's wearing only a tee shirt with a towel draped across his lap. I lifted the towel and found he had about 6 inches of, what appeared to be, 10 guage, single strand copper wire protruding from his penis. The wire was obviously used and had been roughly straighted but was somewhat corroded and rough on its surface. However, the end was freshly cut. When I asked him how this happened he told me he had been "fooling around and the wire got stuck," and he knew that it would be easier for us to move him if he cut the rest of the roll off prior to calling us. He then went on to explain, in some detail, including what drugs would be necessary, what the doctor would have to do to treat him. I asked him how he knew so much about the treatment. His answer was: "That's what they had to do the last time...."
I didn't follow up to see what treatment he got after we delivered him, but as we departed the ER, I swear I heard the voice of the triage nurse saying "You did what???"
Submitted on 11/24/2002
Submitted by:
Captain Kass
Reference:
Personal Account
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