Dinner and the Drunk 
2003 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance
This story is true and was experienced by a dear friend of mine who was on the San Diego Police force and heard it come through the dispatcher, he sent the tape to KFMB radio where they had to do some editing (eliminating many 4 letter words)but did air it, and by chance the original tape was lost.
Late one evening 911 got the following call:
A man called and stated that he needed a "mambulance" when asked about the nature of the incident he proceeded to relay the following story:
He was in Jamul (a rural community, East of downtown San Diego) where he had just left a local bar (he was obviously beyond the legally drunk status) he climbed into his car (an older cadillac) and proceeded down the road. He got a short distance from the bar and spotted a deer in the road, which he promptly hit. He stopped his car and got out to investigate, after careful consideration he decided to put the deer in the backseat of his car (to take home for dinner) and once again started down the road. A mile or two further down the road the deer woke up and proceeded to kick and try to get out, the deer began kicking and bitting the man, so he stopped his car at a phone booth, took the deer (still a little dazed by the accident) and dragged it into the phone booth with him. He then made this call to 911, stating that he needed a "mambulance" he was injured by the deer, who was still struggling kicking and bitting him as he trapped the animal with him in the phone booth. Now another problem arose, a dog was trying to get into the phone booth to get to the deer, the man now completely panicked and requested immediate assistance to protect him from the dog, deer and see to his injurys. The man's speech was terribly slurred, from drinking and he was not very bright, so the dispatcher had a really hard time understanding him. The dispatcher told him to let the deer go, but he refused, he wanted to take the deer home for dinner. A patrol car and "mambulance" were dispatched and found the man at the side of the road, NO DEER, NO DOG, but bleeding from several bites and cuts suffered from the deers attempt to get free. He was taken in and booked for DUI, and kept in a holding cell where he was kept until he sobered up.
IF BY CHANCE YOU HAVE ALREADY RECEIVED THIS STORY, PREFERABLY THE ORIGINAL TAPE, I WOULD LOVE A COPY. THANK YOU
Submitted on 09/23/2002
Submitted by:
Anonymous
Reference:
KFMB Radio-San Diego Ca.(1980)
Copyright © 2002 DarwinAwards.com
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