Darwin Awards: 2002 July Slush Pile

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Darwin Awards
2002 Slush Pile

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Wait a minute, I can't swim!

2003 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

Subtitle: Why women should drive

Thunder Bay is a beautiful city, located on the North Shore of Lake Superior. Our population was decreased by one Darwin Award candidate this past weekend, which because July 1 is our analogy to the USian July 4 was a long weekend.

Our story starts on Obonga Lake (yes, that is a real name - Google "obonga lake ontario"), which is a fairly large lake located about one hundred miles north of Thunder Bay. It should be noted that north of Lake Superior indicates the northern part of the continent. While our lakes do warm up, in most large lakes there is a thin layer of warm water lying over a much colder body of water. Diving into a large lake up here can result in near paralysis when you hit the cold layer only a few feet below the surface.

Our Canada Day weekend was a bit of a scorcher by Thunder Bay standards, with temperatures up in the high 30's C, which would be the high 90's F. Our candidate went for a cooling boat ride with his wife, his two children, and two other children. At some point the ride didn't suffice, so our candidate stopped and dove out of the boat, apparently without thinking much about the wind which was pushing the boat, obviously, downwind.

His first error was ignoring the fact that he was unable to swim.

His second error was neglecting to wear a life jacket, which you might assume would be a natural reflex for a non-swimmer in a boat (I swim very well, but still almost always wear a life jacket). Efforts to throw him a life jacket failed because of the wind - not surprisingly, they are very light and don't throw well.

His third error was miscalculating that although his exposed area, probably the top of his head, was a tiny percentage of that of the boat, he would drift in the wind at the same speed as the boat.

His final error was not having taught his wife to drive the boat, so she was unable to start it and drive back upwind to pick him up. Boats are required by law to have a safety kit: . buoyant heaving line that is at least 15 m long (approx. 50 ft).

. one approved lifejacket - or - one approved Personal Flotation Device (PFD) of the appropriate size for each person on board . sound signalling device (can be a pealess whistle) Refer to: http://www.tnyc.nfld.net/Training_Links/new_regulations.htm

The people in the boat tried in vain to get the attention of people on the shore in time to save the victim. They were waving their arms and yelling. It would have helped had they had available the items in this safety kit.

While my heart goes out to the family that saw this needless death, it can't be said that it couldn't be seen coming when he dove in. Since he has already been credited with children I don't know that he qualifies for a full Darwin, but he certainly won't be adding more non-swimming tadpoles to the gene pool.

edia report follows: (http://www.chroniclejournal.com/story.shtml?id=12218)

Swim for dad ends in tragedy

By Kelly Leydier - The Chronicle-Journal

July 03, 2002

A man who jumped from his boat Sunday to cool off despite not being able to swim is now presumed drowned.

The 38-year-old Thunder Bay man was also not wearing a life-jacket when he jumped from his 17-foot fibreglass boat into Obonga Lake, Thunder Bay OPP Sgt. Deb Tully-Waffler said.

“We have a search ongoing,” she said. “He is missing, presumed drowned.”

Five OPP divers joined the search yesterday for the man, whose name isn’t being released by police at his family’s request.

Two OPP marine units were also helping the Armstrong detachment look for the man, Tully-Waffler said. The divers were using a radar device to help locate his body, she said.

The lake is located about 30 kilometres south of Armstrong, just west of Highway 527. The lake is accessible by road and a few cottages populate the area.

The man was boating with his wife, their two children and two other young relatives at about 5 p.m. The four children ranged in age from two years old to 11, Tully-Waffler said.

The boat, which had a 200-hp motor, drifted while he was alone in the water.

His wife didn’t know how to operate the boat and attempts to throw him a life-preserver failed, Tully-Waffler said.

“It took a long time to get help from shore,” she continued.

The family shouted from the boat and made noise until someone realized they were in distress. Then some local people began to search for him, Tully-Waffler said.

Submitted on 07/03/2002

Submitted by: dmr
Reference: Thunder Bay Chronicle Journal

Copyright © 2002 DarwinAwards.com

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Larry said:
Definitely Keep: Darwin Award
Now *that's* a Darwin Award!


Duncan said:
Definitely Keep: Darwin Award
Biased - I submitted this one!


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