Dying for breakfast on the go 
2003 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance
Darwin Awards were made for people like this. A gentleman from New Brunswick, Canada, was late leaving for a meeting in another town. He dashed out of the house, toast and Diner-esque packets of jam in hand. He also, being an intelligent man, brought with him a needlessly sharp and pointy kitchen utility knife with which to spread the jam on his toast.
He got out on the highway and proceeded to fix himself breakfast on the go. Presumably, on hand held the bread and the other held the knife. Presumably, his eyes and mind were focused on not spilling jam on his suit.
Presumably, he thought one easily could drive this way. He crossed the centre line at some point and wrenched the wheel back to avoid a head-on collision; he sailed back across his lane and crashed into a sideline post. He was wearing a seatbelt and might have survived - if the flying jam knife hadn't pierced his eye and gone straight through to his brain and killed him. Submitted on 05/26/2002
Submitted by:
Neil C. Raynor
Reference:
Halifax Herald; summer 2001
Copyright © 2002 DarwinAwards.com
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