Darwin Awards: 2002 April Slush Pile

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2002 April Slush
Russian Roullete
Inmate bleeds to death
Inmate apparently slips on own
Sharp Tooth of the Law
Bridge Work
Lawn Chair Anchor
The Sodium Hydroxide Gargle
Bullets in a war zone?
Deep fried Casio
Jetski Bob
Car Jumpers
Air Ambulance GTI - Honourable
Bad Escape
On/Off Dynamite
Death slide on escalator
Snakes Bite Drunks
Motorcycle Madness
Stupid Oral Sex
WWWHUMP
Lit fart laugh
Smoking Kills
Canadian "BASE" jumper
How to stop a truck.
Arson Suspect Badly Burned
Explosion burns women, vehicle
The Deer Hunter
Rockford man hurt in gas blast
The Love Bug
Circut rider
Man Electrocutes self
Speeder dies evading ticket
Don't Blade and Drive
Buggy Leap
tennis ball or fireball
Blown Dead
I admit it, I'm an idiot
Break Out Burglar
Man sleeping in truck crushed
Sharks 1, Fisherman 0.
Grinder
Iron Man
Quick Draw
Airgun Power
Backbreaking Blunder
sniffing lighter gas
Security guard's death . . .
Why Don't You Die!?
blinking light
Paraglider's friend
Driver Stops on I-95 to look a
Garbage Can Cannon
Let's Play Catch
Little boy George's adventure
Dumbo's went sailing.
Researcher loses part of leg
H2S death baffles cops
Boredom relief
Electrifying Xmas - True Story
Man dies in farm accident
Jumping a Car
Downwind Fire
Pilot injured in explosion
Master Mechanic - Honorable Me
I am ready to DIIEEE for my Ca
Boeing 307 Crash--Forgot gas?
Horseplay at the OK Corral
re: "Overkill"
What's Wrong With This Picture
Boy dies in basketball mishap
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Darwin Awards
2002 Slush Pile

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Backbreaking Blunder

2003 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

In france this february i was with my mate Alex skiing, i've been skiing more times than him and in my eyes i was better than him, throughout the week we hadn't seen much of each other because we were both of different standards. On the last day we decided it would be a good idea to go down a few runs with each other and have a good time, that we did for the first half of the day when alex took the lead, in the second half of the day i told him i'd take him to the snowpark and show him how to do a few jumps, we arrived at the snowpark at around 3:30pm, my exact words were "you can't hurt yourself skiing, i'll show you how it's done", starting from about 300m away from the jump i began my descent down the slope, gathering as much speed as it took to make my eyes stream with tears i took the jump. I remember seeing the ground get further and further away beneath me, i knew i was high and i knew it was gonna hurt, to top it off in the panick stricken state i was in i forgot about the whole "lean forward when taking a jump" thing and landed square on my left arse cheek, the pain was undescribable, all i can say is you can never scream loud enough for the pain of breaking your back in 4 places! the next 4 hours i spent having to endure frenchmen ripping the piss out of me, a few of the phrases used were "hahhahaa, il mal la fesse!", and "it's gonna hurt when you take a shit", doctors messing up the x-ray density to show two clearly outlined testicles and one penis displayed in the waiting room. To hit two birds with one stone i would like to nominate my hospital friend Kenneth Du Pont for an honorable mention, a danish guy who splintered his shin on the same jump that i broke my back on. The french guy was right, it hurt when i took a shit, and 3 months later i still have no feeling in my left arse cheek, but man am i lucky to walk again!

Submitted on 04/16/2002

Submitted by: Ollie Norris
Reference: Personal Account 27/01/2002

Copyright © 2002 DarwinAwards.com

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Bruce said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
Quite amusing, definitely stupid ans probably can be cleaned up quite nicely.


Silverhill said:
Neutral: Honorable Mention
A case of "testosterone poisoning," surely, but maybe not Darwinian enough.


Gregory said:
Neutral: Personal Account
maybe reckless, but still accident


Tracy said:
Neutral: Personal Account


R&B said:
Neutral: Personal Account
Skiing mishaps are quite common, but the bravado has merit.


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