Backbreaking Blunder
2003 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance
In france this february i was with my mate Alex skiing, i've been skiing more times than him and in my eyes i was better than him, throughout the week we hadn't seen much of each other because we were both of different standards. On the last day we decided it would be a good idea to go down a few runs with each other and have a good time, that we did for the first half of the day when alex took the lead, in the second half of the day i told him i'd take him to the snowpark and show him how to do a few jumps, we arrived at the snowpark at around 3:30pm, my exact words were "you can't hurt yourself skiing, i'll show you how it's done", starting from about 300m away from the jump i began my descent down the slope, gathering as much speed as it took to make my eyes stream with tears i took the jump. I remember seeing the ground get further and further away beneath me, i knew i was high and i knew it was gonna hurt, to top it off in the panick stricken state i was in i forgot about the whole "lean forward when taking a jump" thing and landed square on my left arse cheek, the pain was undescribable, all i can say is you can never scream loud enough for the pain of breaking your back in 4 places! the next 4 hours i spent having to endure frenchmen ripping the piss out of me, a few of the phrases used were "hahhahaa, il mal la fesse!", and "it's gonna hurt when you take a shit", doctors messing up the x-ray density to show two clearly outlined testicles and one penis displayed in the waiting room. To hit two birds with one stone i would like to nominate my hospital friend Kenneth Du Pont for an honorable mention, a danish guy who splintered his shin on the same jump that i broke my back on. The french guy was right, it hurt when i took a shit, and 3 months later i still have no feeling in my left arse cheek, but man am i lucky to walk again!Submitted on 04/16/2002
Submitted by:
Ollie Norris
Reference:
Personal Account 27/01/2002
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