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2011 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

Crazy Taxi

2011 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

For Daniel S. Park of Herndon, Virginia, Saturday evening was like any good weekend night for young man barely over the legal drinking age. It was a night of revelry with a few good friends, fueled on copious amounts of Alcohol. But it was when the party ended in the pre-dawn hours of Sunday morning that Mr. Park's saga towards inevitable gene pool removal began.

Heavily inebriated, our intrepid hero got behind the wheel of his stylish BMW to begin the long journey home on Interstate 66; a road infamous in the region for its heavy traffic and constant use, even during the dead of night on a Weekend. This act alone stood a good chance of granting Mr. Park a coveted Darwin Award for the simple fact of taking the risk of driving while intoxicated. Yet it was in a moment of sober clarity that Mr. Park gained immortality and the notice of his home region. Realizing he was within moments of puking up his nights supply of booze onto his beloved and stylish BMW's interior, Mr. Park pulled to the side of the Interstate and leapt from his car so he could relieve himself. Alas, in his drunken haste to spare his vehicle, he chose the center of the highways on coming lanes as the site of kneeling heaving. Withing moments, he was struck and killed by a fast moving vehicle that hit him with such force, the Virginia State Police had to spend 8 hours looking for pieces of his body and the vehicle that hit him across a wide stretch of Interstate.

The final Irony of this saga is that the vehicle that struck him was a Taxi, perhaps the very Taxi that would have picked him up from the site of his drunken revelry if he had had the presence to call for a cab instead of getting behind the wheel himself.

Submitted on 04/03/2011

Submitted by: Charles McLeod
Reference: http://www.myfoxdc.com/dpp/news/local/virginia-man-struck-and-killed-on-i-66-040311

Copyright © 2011 DarwinAwards.com

>> Moderator Scores <<

Bruce said:
Definitely Toss: Lacks Excellence
Thanks, Charles, but we get lots of stories about people getting struck by cars on highways. And drunk driving is just way too common and no all that amusing either. We also don't know if anybody in the taxi was injured, which might be the case given the apparent speed of the impact.


Candi said:
Definitely Toss: Lacks Excellence
What Bruce said.


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