Charles Darwin's Darwin Awards 
HOME
Darwin Awards
At-Risk Survivors
Slush Pile
2011 March Rejects
Another charge at a window pane
Man, 19, Plunges 30 Feet To Death
Man dies after running thru window
Man tries to tackle a window
Man dies after fall from Petersen C
More than wind in the hair
Man Electrocuted At Duke Substation
Alleged Metairie public masturbator
French vegans in dock over baby's d
WW2 Jeep Vs. Flood Water
Keeping Guns Safe
Man dies placing Fall Hazard sign
Brazilian Cliff Danger
Pot,shots get 911 caller six months
Firework Nutshot
Blinded by the Light(er)
Should have used a flashlight
Flammable + Fire = Bad
Deadly blast caused by vapors ignit
'Fly By Turn Off'
Got a light ?
Covelo woman fleeing CHP drowns in
Man uses lighter to look into flama
Lighters Provide Light, Right?
Court Sas mauling covered by work
A cab was too expensive...
japanease honor.
porn avalanche.
Too many action movies?
Soldier eats poisonous beetle
Running Taxi to Death
Soldiers play Russian Roulette
Driving while shooting up...
a lesson in the location of markets
Animal rights activist shot in face
Teen burned in fire pit accident
Man found in trash truck Friday ide
Norwegian Candel
Chef falls to his death
Lemonade Can Kill You
Man dies trying to see the tsunami
Little Snowflakes doing Party Snow
it just came out of nowhere.
Dad of gas-soaked stun gun victim s
Man goes to See Tsunami Goes to sea
Muere policía ¡por jugar con arma!
Black Activist or Rape Activist
Man dead after being swept to sea
A very posthumous Darwin Award?
Kayaker drowns
Only Americans
Mountain Rules
Burglar hangs self leaving store
woman ran over by her own car
Taking pictures of the tidal wave!
Tsunami Watch.
Tsunami Watch.
Tsunami filmed from the beach
Just Smile and Wave
California Tsunami Victim
So tsunami!
tsunami photographer
Some men you just can't reach.
Man killed trying to observe tsunam
Is Tsunami's dangerous? Duh...
Man Drowns Photographing Tsunami
US Man Killed Photographing Tsunami
Tsunami Coming, Head to Beach
Woman fatally struck by own car
Brandon Webber
He had 12 hours of warning...
Tsunami Photographer
Dustin Weber -Swept Away By Tsunami
curious onlooker killed by tsunami
How does a tsunami work again?
Tsunami: Search called off for man
Tsunami or later ...
I'm a good swimmer!
swept out while watching tsunami
Tsunami Photographer Killed by Wave
On a dare 17-year-old survives jump
Lowering the Boom
Brick Rustling Gone Wrong
kills self in concealed carry class
Going to new Heights
Ghost Riding
Seemed like a good idea
Gun class accident
Cop takes gun class, and accidently
Anti Living Injection
Soldier killed in game of Russian r
Trailer Hitch-hiker
Man died crossing a motorway
Home Invasion Crooks get Juvenile S
19 yr old killed in garage crash
How not to build your igloo
Soldier Dies in Game of Russian Rou
End of Winter
Death by Gellato
Igloo making what not to do
Eating yourself to death.
Carjacked the wrong guy
Camper van CO poisoning
Surrey man, 76, killed cutting tree
Arguing in the middle of a highway
Idiot Photographer
Woman crushed by own car REPO
Man Rams State Troopers Cruiser
In bed with a Cobra...
Killed by safety alarm
Mulched to death
Drunk Ski Instructor
Afghan Hot Potato
Older Rejects 
 
~ Random Story ~
Email Alert!
NEW! Gift Shop
Rules  Search
Contact Darwin
Submit a Story
Philosophy Forum
Home

  

Darwin Awards
2011 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

Lemonade Can Kill You

2011 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

This is only an Urban Legend... Jenny Wing was not the brightest crayon in the box, but she surpassed herself the day she decided to make a bit of cash by selling some homemade lemonade. What could be easier?

On the day, Jenny assembled roughly a litre of homemade lemonade, one table, one tablecloth, some antique glasses, and a china teapot for the money. On the way to her destination she stopped at her local supermarket, and purchased their entire stock of lemonade (over 100 bottles) plus assorted spirits including vodka, wine, and beer. To make her lemonade look more homemade, she poured it into a huge plastic shipping container in the back of her truck. Because she still felt like she didn’t have enough liquid, she added some sprits, and cracked open a can of beer for herself.

When she got to the base of Brood’s Hill, Jenny was then faced with a ‘complex’ decision: leave the alcoholic-lemonade in the unattractive truck; or pull it out. Eventually, Jenny settled on pushing it out, and positioned herself behind the container. However, the container weighed roughly a ton and so, instead of it moving, Jenny fell into it.

Upon clambering out onto the slippy deck, Jenny drunk her remaining beer to calm herself – and now, very drunk, she got back into the truck, and headed to the top of Brood’s Hill, where she’d try again. She backed into a spot, and stopped herself against two pillars – and forgot to take the keys out of the ignition. She got out, and began to unlatch the back of the track – the only part wide enough to stop the truck. When she finally flipped it down, a ton of lemonade, and a table crushed and then drowned her, she was cut multiple times by some broken china, and was finally run over by her own truck.

Submitted on 03/19/2011

Submitted by: Anonymous
Reference:

Copyright © 2011 DarwinAwards.com

>> Moderator Scores <<

Bruce said:
Definitely Toss: Urban Legend
Thanks, but this sounds like a rather obvious urban legend to me, and not a very funny one at that either.


Candi said:
Definitely Toss: Urban Legend
What Bruce said.


The Darwin Awards Gift Shop

The Darwin Awards Condom

Keep yourself out of the gene pool!
A condom in a matchbook, useful for emergency contraception, bachelor parties, frat parties, and important rites of passage. LOADED inside and out with funny quotes and stories. Everyone loves this item!
Friends don't let friends reproduce!
$13 for Pack of 4

 

 

Slush Pile
Slush Pile Rejects

HomeRulesFAQsAwardsSlushSite Map
DarwinAward | HonorableMention | PersonalAccount | UrbanLegend