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2008 December Rejects
Stand Clear, Doors Closing.
Merry-go-ouch
The DR is not very smart
Indoor Barbeque
Gas explosion
A church organist was found dead at
Parenting requires intelligence
Santa Shooter
Swimming Snowplow
Wrong Heater Fuel Blamed for Killer
Boat ramp blunder
Do not urinate on the rails!
Shockingly Stupid
The apprentice assassine
Train of mistakes !
Lonely man finds bear nuts
Man lights 50 sparklers at once
A burning desire to impress
dying for a smoke
Smoker on ventilator burned
Bandit shoots off ‘private part’
Big bang, small brain.
Taking a leak on railway tracks
Railtracks =/= Toilet
Call of nature answered on railway
Bahngleis als Toilette benutzt
Deadly Dump on Rails
man jumps from bridge to avoid semi
Don't smoke with oxygen
Flamin' hot partytrick
Daredevil's fatal plunge.
We don't sell tobacco to minors.
death by condom and laughing gas
Mom Killed, Son Hurt By Train
Man, Machine & Manure Lagoon
lodged snow blower
Trashed
A Wrong Way to Use a Blowtorch
the exploding women
How NOT to melt ice.
Man using cutting torch to thaw ice
Ice Breaker
Couple gets lost in snow after trip
Impaled
Kids watch as dad is electrocuted
Man melting snow with blowtorch ign
Kite+Power lines+Metal pole=Safe?
Blowtorch Man
Man melting snow with blowtorch ign
Man uses blowtorch to melt snow
Ambulance Fail
Mass. man melting snow with blowtor
The Kite Hunter
Man lights home on fire
Man melting snow with blowtorch ign
http://www.southcoasttoday.com
Hardcore rocker strangles himself o
The Icecapade!
Hunter & Deer Fall to their Deaths
When anger backfiress
Two potential darwins
Son watches father receive a Darwin
A total shock
Newton he ain't!
Shocking!
Weiner Slips and Dies
Kite electrocution
Woman dies in trash compactor
father electrocuted in front of kid
Kite + Metal Pole + Power Lines
Metal pole and powerlines
Man dies getting kite off power lin
Man Killed Rescuing Kite
Kite Zapping
Electrocuted Retrieving Kite
Man dies getting kite off power lin
Man electrocuted while fetching kit
Kite a shocking story
Motorcycle rear ends truck
Lonely man jumps into polar bear’s
Man steps into elevator shaft
Youth loses face in explosive sex a
Mouse's Revenge
Man steps into elevator shaft
Accidentally stabbed to death
Evidence Left at Crime Scene
Two arrested in bizarre assault
delieverence 2008
Teen injured in sledding accident
Historical Darwin
Womans set Husband Genitals on Fire
SoCal Woman Stuck on Tracks Called
Inadequate Training
Drew peterson's ladies
SoCal Woman Stuck on Tracks Called
Stuck on Train Tracks, Called 911
Woman Stuck on Tracks Called 911
FATAL FIRE
SoCal Woman Stuck on Tracks Called
Drew Peterson New Fiancee
Three people killed by foot massage
Three young women found dead at Squ
Wiggle It
teenager who choked himself
stalker victim
Benton City burglar dies in fire he
Blast at Oregon Bank Kills 2 Law En
ATM kills woman
Over the top Stalkee..
It's the coverup, not the crime
Burglar, Burglar, House on Fire
Unusual death
Lets take the bomb inside the bank!
Video shows ATM death was accident
blow torches and teachers don't mix
flying vendore
Man accidentally kills himself with
Special Award for G.W. Bush
Gregory Wayne Fisher
Family cat attacks family jewels
bomb technician
Bomb Investigation gone wrong
The battle of La Marfée
Bank blast kills officer, bomb expe
iPod + Train
man raises temperature of testicles
Two Officers Die of Injuries From a
Another Blue Day
Keep Eyes and Ears on the Road
perfect example of a darwin award
Mood light & gas don't Mix
Steeler comes a copper...
Riding Handrail Leads to Death
Dieter tries to outdo whale
1guy1cup
Copper theft man killed by fumes
Man Cuts His Own Throat on Stage
Young dies playing of roulette-Russ
Man dies during copper theft
Idiot
Moped driver collides wi mailbox
Big Finish
Man kills himself playing Russian R
Man's arm amputated after collision
Kidding with a gun shooted his head
Though it was unloaded
Pointed pants
Russian Roulete ends in death
Man lights cigarette, sets face on
Man lights cigarette, sets face on
Lift shafts
You Left The Clubs Too Late.
Teen killed, 2 men wounded in chase
A Bridge to Nowhere
Dead In the Water
Now That's A Strong Drink
I Hope He Burns for What He Did!
Setting the School Aflame
Gunman on bike hit, killed on Truma
Mushroom Madness
Gunman on bike hit, killed on Truma
Gunman on bike hit, killed on Truma
Suburban indoor barbeque
A tender behind
Kareoke Croakie
Boy Decapitated at Six Flags
8yr old boy with UZI
Managing director uses live bomb fo
Don't hide here
Woman swept to sea during proposal
Crossing: look left and right
Drink driver ran over himself
Man Killed Stealing Wire
Wrong Way Wreck Wreaks Woe
Gypsy Bang
Man fatally stricken while carrying
Deer gets revenge
Speed Camera racer
Texting on Cell, Killed by Train
WHEELIE, I CAN DO THIS!
Trampled by Bargain Seeker
pig headed safety lesson
Father Shoots Son With Shotgun
(Almost) Gone 2 the Dogs
just a picture
Man run over by own van
Speed Bump Daddy
Both Vehicles Were Stolen
Accident with Samurai Sword
Hard Cider Makes for a Hard Swim
No arms, No problem
Man drowns in storm drain trying to
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2008 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
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Setting the School Aflame

2008 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

Ashamedly, I'm the contender in this story; for reference, you could also ask the 9th grade science teacher Mr. Melingonis about this story.

In lab class 2 years ago, some experiments naturally involved heating substances. For this purpose, we use what I incorrectly call "bunsen burners": small cones of glass filled with oil and equipped with a wick. When used properly, they're handy little things.

One day, while I was angling mine to heat a cylinder of some substance-or-other to its boiling point, the side of my burner burst into flame. I still wonder how this was accomplished, but no matter. I did what most people would do if they found a flaming object in their hand (which my teacher maintains was the fatal mistake): I dropped it like a hot glass potato.

Now, I can see this being a bad mistake, for dropping fragile, flaming GLASS burners on tile floors isn't exactly common sense-oriented. Thankfully, the burner remained intact. However, THE TILE FLOOR CAUGHT ON FIRE.

My teacher was at the head of the class, apparently assuming that 9th grade science class isn't advanced enough to warrant supervision. I timidly wave my arms a little, speaking up. "Mr. Mel...Mr. Mel!" He continues his paperwork.

If this ever happens again, I resolve to yell "HOLY **** THE FLOOR IS ON MOTHER****** FIRE!!! GET OVER HERE!"

By now, the rest of the class is peering curiously over their peg boards. Science class AND a show! What luck! I think they deserve to be on this site, too: if two square feet of the floor is on fire and spreading, don't just stare with childish wonder.

Mr. Mel finally arrives, peering at the fire with an owlish look. He kicks the burner over with his foot, apparently intending to let the fire burn out its transient lifetime.

Fire #2 pops up, with fire #1 still burning industriously.

The resolution: Mr. Mel grabs a tin can full of water and dumps it on fire #2, which by now is spreading up the rubber bottom of the countertop. Fire #1 has burned itself out, and my heart slowly resumes its normal pounding.

Several things to consider:

1. The fire alarm never went off at any point in time during or after the fire.

2. Mr. Mel arrived the next morning to find two janitors pointing dumbly at the charred bottom of the countertop.

3. Nobody made a move for fire blanket/extinguisher/the door. I ponder the need for a hands-on fire training for each class. Set the room on fire at the start of each year and see if anyone ever does something about it.

4. My sister has Mr. Mel this year as a teacher. Apparently, at the start of each year he now tells his classes not to drop flaming objects on the ground, but rather to aim for the sink. When she reminded him of me, he responded with a cheerful whimper.

5. I have chemistry class this year.

Submitted on 12/07/2008

Submitted by: Hillary
Reference: Personal Account

Copyright © 2008 DarwinAwards.com

>> Moderator Scores <<

Bruce said:
Definitely Toss: No Self-Selection
This sounds more like an unlucky series of events more than any outright stupidity, at least on your part. It sounds like you had been taught to hold the oil burners in your hand, which is incredibly unsafe as you ultimately learned. (Or perhaps I just misread and whatever it was you were heating burst into flame) Whatever the case, you reacted as any sane person would in order to avoid burning themselves. After that, however, it sounds like the teacher was somewhat inept in his handling of the fire. I don't see any true stupidity in these events.


Candi said:
Definitely Toss: No Self-Selection
What Bruce said, And I rather agree on the hands on fire training. And Hillary, please please PLEASE be careful in chemistry! Especially don't drop elemental sodium in water. (There's several stories, esp. in the older archives, on what happens when you do THAT!)


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