Slush Pile: Stupid and Shocking Again!!

2008 Slush Pile

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Stupid and Shocking Again!!

2008 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

Why, oh why, don't people learn about these things?! For, possibly, the millionth time in the history of this planet another person has killed themselves trying to steal copper wire and that's why this person deserves a Darwin Award.

This happens sooooooo frequently that anyone who steals this stuff HAS to be aware of the dangers of this crime. My guess is that when someone is going out to do this a conversation like this probably happens:

"Look man, I'm not sure this is a good idea because a lot of people have died doing this and what are we gonna make, maybe a couple hundred bucks?"

"Relax dude, those guys were idiots. I know what I'm doing."

So why do people persist in doing this dangerous activity without an intimate knowledge of the workings of electrical power conduits? If they are going to do this they should probably bring along an electrician or at least study how to deal with high voltage before attempting to work with it.

I'm convinced that a lot people who do this are illiterate because they can't read "Danger High Voltage" signs.

So this guy brings along two friends in order to help him with this shockingly stupid crime. The three musketeers proceed to the abandoned Panteg steelworks, in Pontypool, South Wales. These master criminals don't realize that abandoned doesn't mean completely devoid of electricity. A lesson that should have been learned a few days before and was a fatal lack of knowledge in a group of noggins bereft of common sense.

Anyhoo, one of this dullards, probably the self professed most intelligent one of these thickheaded numskulls, proceeds to cut through the conduit and to the copper wire beneath. While the copper wire beneath was unhooked to any live electrical source the wire next to it that this moron accidentally pierced was still hooked to the national grid which carries 11,000 volts.

Guess what happened!! The body of this thief was discovered outside the perimeter fence of the steelworks on the morning of April 10 this year.

It seems his slow witted buddies had attempted to carry his body from the crime scene. However, they dropped the body and ran when they thought they had been spotted. In a sense dropped dead is a good way of describing this act.

Detective Constable Gordon Poole of Gwent Police said this braintrust had been at the steelworks a few days before his death to steal some copper. He added that electricity to much of the site had been shut down when an attempt to cut copper wire with an axe had pierced a live cable carrying less than 500 volts. Yes you read that right. The simpleton had been there a few days before and pierced a live wire with an axe!! That alone should have been a clue that that the site still had live electrical wiring at different points around the building. Take a moment and reread that and marvel at the stupidity behind those actions because marveling at stupidity is what this site is all about.

For some reason they felt a post mortem was necessary and, very surprisingly, it reveled the man had died from electrocution. Ya think!?!

"The deputy coroner for Gwent, Wendy James, said toxicology tests found amphetamines in Mr. Morons bloodstream consistent with 'recent abuse' which she believes would have increased his risk-taking.

'Mr Moron had no right to be at the site,' said Miss James. 'It is perfectly clear he ignored all the warnings over the dangers of electricity.'

She added: 'Never has the old saying "crime never pays" been so graphically illustrated as in this case. These type of thefts are on the increase and people should heed the warnings of the dangers of electricity. If they choose to ignore the warnings they will pay the highest price possible."

'Nuff said.

Submitted on 09/18/2008

Submitted by: Jonathan Brown
Reference: http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/crime/article4780648.ece

>> Moderator Scores <<

Bruce said:
Definitely Toss: Repeat
Thanks, Jonathan, we've already received this story.

Candi said:
Definitely Toss: Repeat
What Bruce said.

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2008 Slush Pile

Stupid and Shocking Again!!

2008 Reader Submission Pending Acceptance

2008 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance