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Darwin Awards
2008 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

A dog day afternoon

2008 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

This is taken directly from the archives on dumbcrooks.com for July 2000. This one crook exhibited such utter and breathtaking stupidity that I'm surprised no one else has nominated him-I did run a search on this!

---------------------------------------------------

In the early afternoon two Tacoma Police bicycle officers contacted a known suspect in a full-sized pickup for Driving While License Suspended (a misdemeanor). As the officers were preparing to issue a ticket, the male suspect put the truck in gear and quickly drove away. One officer was struck by the truck’s side-view mirror injuring him slightly. The other officer jumped out of the way however, the suspect drove over his bicycle destroying it.

Minutes later a third officer (in a car) began a pursuit with the now felony suspect. After a few minutes the officer ended the chase because of the level of danger the pursuit had reached. About two hours later a State Trooper located the unoccupied truck outside of a Fife, Washington hotel along Interstate 5. As officers attempted to surround the hotel the suspect (now wanted on numerous felonies) jumped out a hotel room window and began to run toward Interstate 5.

A Tacoma K9 team was just arriving and deployed the dog. At this time the suspect was climbing the 8 foot highway fence on the shoulder of I-5. As the suspect jumped down on the other side of the fence it appeared that he was once again going to elude police and the K9 now barking through the fence at the suspect. Instead of continuing with his short-lived freedom, the suspect turned and began kicking dirt through the fence and into the face of the frustrated K9; appearing not like a desperate fugitive, but more like an angry baseball player kicking dirt at the umpire. The suspect then laughed and turned to continue running across I-5. He was immediately struck by a car, breaking his right leg and causing multiple injuries, including a punctured lung.

Was that enough..nooooo! With a bad leg and one working lung, the suspect gimped his way across the rest of the 8 lane freeway and continued out of sight near the Puyallup river. While injured seriously, the suspect found the perfect hiding place in bushes on the river’s bank. The K9 team made it over the fence and successfully across the Interstate. The K9 dog, as you would expect, was just a tad bit angry. While his nostrils were still full of dirt and gravel from the suspects earlier rudeness, he was hot on the trail of the bad guy. The suspect was fully concealed in bushes as the K9 neared his location. Only a small part of the suspect could be seen by the approaching K9; the section from the suspects belly button down to the mid-thigh was the only target. Wham! The K9 located and hit the target. Yep, right between the suspects legs….two in custody….I mean, one in custody! This truly reminded the suspect what a “real man” he was!

So, from a simple traffic ticket to serious injuries, multiple felony charges, and a premature end to the suspects future family plans. Now thats what I call a bad day!

Submitted on 05/11/2008

Submitted by: Robert
Reference: dumbcrooks.com

Copyright © 2008 DarwinAwards.com

>> Moderator Scores <<

Candi said:
Definitely Keep: Honorable Mention
I was unable find this on www.thenewstribune.com or the other local papers. (More than a preview costs $.) I don't know if this was submitted when this happened. But the dumbcrooks.com reference does check out. And the bike officer was only injured 'slightly'. It is a sure thing that, even if he had lost the police, he would have had to either go to a hospital or die. I understand that when someone has proven as stubborn as this guy, K9s' biting hard and fast on available 'anatomy' is sometimes done. And running from a misdemeanor is just plain stupid! Thanks for this interesting post! (PS My son was born in 7/00. I wasn't exactly thinking of the news at the time!)


Bruce said:
Definitely Toss: Other
Thanks for an entertaining story, Robert. However this story isn't all that different from dozens of other cases of idiots running from the police, and the fact that a police officer was slightly injured by this mook also disqualifies it in my book. Thanks just the same.


Chip said:
Definitely Toss: Bystanders Hurt
I remember this story well. It is a dumb crooks story alright and I would give it a checkmark for the uniqueness of it, but the bicycle officers were hurt and that automatically disqualifies this for an award. Thanks for the story, Robert.


Shadow said:
Definitely Toss: Bystanders Hurt
I agree that the Officers being injured does count as bystanders hurt... thanks for the submission tho!


James said:
Definitely Toss: Too Common
Humorous indeed, but such things are too common for a DA. That's why we usually refer such stories to DumbCrooks.com in the first place! :-)


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