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Darwin Awards
2006 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

ERRENT MOTORIST RUNS OVER SELF

2006 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

WOMAN RUNS OVER HERSELF.

I know that there are rules about being hit by a car, but I think my story qualifies as an exception. Afterall, not everyone can manage to run over themself whilst backing up on one of the busiest commuter roadways in this part of the Northwest Chicago-land area. But Natividad Andrea Torres actually managed to do it!

First of all, I just don't know how she did it. This is one road that is ... well ... just plain jam packed full of people commuting to work. How on Earth did she actually managed back up at all? But okay, fine. I digress. This woman managed to do it. I suppose I'll have to accept that. So naturally, she does what anyone else would do whilst backing up on a highway with heavy traffic. She OPENED HER DRIVER-SIDE CAR DOOR AND HAD MOST OF HER BODY HANGING OUT THE DOOR WHILE BACKING UP!!! We'll never know what posessed her to do any of this. But whatever seemingly bright idea might have been lurking in her severely misguided brain, unfortunately for her, the laws of gravity physics soon took control of the situation. She fell headlong onto the road and tumbled under her own car. She was thereafter dragged to death. The whole scenario absolutly baffles me. I have repeatedly asked myself, "How can someone run over themself?" Natividad Andrea Torres had the answer to that question ... at least for a few brief moments.

Apparently, while she was in the throes of such unbelievably bad judgement, she must have been speeding along (backwards) at a pretty good clip. After she had fallen out and under the car, obviously there couldn't have been anything left pushing in the gas pedal. Ms. Torres' vehicle had enough inertia to veer into the grassy median, come back out of it, and slam into a Semi Trailer. Torres' Ford Contour was wedged underneath that trailer when the police arrived.

Natividad Andrea Torres was 26 years old, and had yet to reproduce. She has thusly completely deprived the human gene pool of her errant judgement and highly questionable driving skills.

The Following is the Chicago Tribune Article referencing this ... um ... 'accident.'

"Woman killed by own car Jul 31, 2006

By Dan P. Blake Tribune staff reporter

A 26-year-old driver was run over and killed by her own car in northwest suburban Buffalo Grove after she fell out an open door while backing up on a roadway, police said.

The driverless car eventually struck a semi-trailer truck.

Natividad Andrea Torres, of Wheeling, suffered fatal head and leg injuries and died this morning at Advocate Lutheran General Hospital in Park Ridge, a Cook County medical examiner's office spokesman said.

At 10:38 a.m. Thursday, Torres was backing up her 1998 Ford Contour in the middle lane of westbound Lake Cook Road just east of Milwaukee Avenue on the border of Wheeling and Buffalo Grove, when she fell out of the driver's side door, Buffalo Grove Police Sgt. Mark Bucalo said.

Police speculated she might have been backing up because she may have missed a turn. It wasn't clear why the door was open.

Torres was dragged underneath her vehicle for a short distance before being run over, Bucalo said. The driverless, out-of-control car continued across the lanes of Lake Cook Road into a grassy area, spun around and came back up on the roadway, where it hit a semi-trailer truck in the center lane.

The maroon car became lodged underneath the rear wheels of the semi, Bucalo said. The truck's driver, from Wisconsin, was not injured in the crash.

Bucalo said investigators with the Buffalo Grove Police Traffic Unit and the Lake County Major Crash Assistance Team are looking into what caused the vehicle to continue out of control. He said it was possible the floor mat became struck against the gas pedal.

In a separate fatal accident Thursday, a pedestrian was struck by a vehicle around 8:50 p.m. as he walked out of a bar at Cermak Road and Gunderson Avenue in Berwyn, Berwyn Fire Deputy Chief Dennis O'Halloran said.

The unidentified man, estimated in his 40s, was taken to Loyola University Medical Center in Maywood where he was pronounced dead at 9:41 p.m., a medical examiner's office spokesman said.

Berwyn police could not immediately provide details of the crash.

Copyright © 2006, Chicago Tribune"

Note: I wasn't able to find this article on the Chicago Tribune's main website ... mainly because they just donn't make things easy to find. My wife was at work at a building right at that intersection. She saw the commotion of all this from the window at her workplace, but she couldn't sort out exactly what had happened. Even for an accident involving a fatality, this crash scene took an extrordiarily long time to clear. I assume the police couldn't quite believe what they were hearing from witnesses. So the next day, she did some digging and found this or some similar article in the Chicago Tribune. So I know for certain that it's an authentic story. I'm also sure that the article was by the Chicago Tribune, which is a pretty reliable source of information. Also, there were several accounts of first-hand witness that saw the woman was hanging out of the car, holding onto the car door just prior to falling out. Unfortunately, I don't have a source for those accounts.

Submitted on 09/06/2006

Submitted by: Kevin Sampson
Reference: http://www.biketraffic.org/con

Copyright © 2006 DarwinAwards.com

>> Moderator Scores <<

Sheryl said:
Neutral: Darwin Award
Thanks for the story, Kevin. While we do normally toss "running over yourself" as too common, your write-up, the information on the traffic situation and the oddities in this story make me tend toward letting the readers see it.


Fitzroy said:
Maybe Toss: Other
I hate to be unsatisfyingly vague in my feedback, but we really don't know why she did this. I surely does seem stupid, but confirmed stupidity is another matter. I really liked the write-up and I wish I could pass this along on the merit of that effort. Yet I feel obliged to be consistent and go negative here as I have with this story in the past. Still, the submission and the excellent write-up are appreciated.


James said:
Neutral: Darwin Award
We actually received this story several times when it first came out, but it was the SAME DRY JOURNALISM which caused me to just zap it. Kevin's write-up, as well as the fact that his wife was there at the scene add something more personal to it. In the end, it really doesn't matter WHY the late Ms. Torres did what she did, it was plain DUMB! I like this version enough to keep it!


Jorge said:
Maybe Toss: Not Amusing


Graham said:
Maybe Toss: Too Common
Falling out of the vehicle or not, backing up on such a road deserves a mention on its own merit! Fortunately, that particular gene strain has been eliminated


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