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| The Darwin Awards salutes the spirit portrayed in the following personal accounts, submitted by loyal (and sometimes deceased) readers. |
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(March 2000) This story is an honorable mention at best, but it is well down the road to bizarre. Back in 1984, I worked as a security guard in an Idaho hospital. One of my duties was to assist the Emergency Room staff with difficult patients.
Late one Saturday night, I was paged to get to the Emergency Room STAT. As I came rushing down the corridor, I could hear increasingly loud screaming, but curiously, also laughter. I rounded the corner and saw the head nurse leaning against the wall, holding a pan full of syringes and laughing so hard she was crying. The ambulance had just brought in a very drunken individual, wearing nothing but a shirt and a bloody towel around his waist. He was too intoxicated and in too much pain to say what he had been doing, but his entire crotch area was filled with porcupine quills. It took the doctor the better part of three hours to remove them. DarwinAwards.com © 1994 - 2009 Submitted by: Don Cooley |
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The Darwin Awards: Evolution in Action
Hardback. 327 pages. Autographed.$15 185 Stories! In the ongoing saga of Survival of the Fittest, meet the thief who steals electrical wires without shutting off the current! Marvel at the would-be pilot who suspends his lawnchair from helium balloons! Learn from the man who peers into a gas can using a cigarette lighter...! This book also includes a History of the Darwin Awards, Darwin Haiku, and a dozen humorous discussions of the implications of evolution, including the origin of idiots, and the role of testosterone. Autographed by Author! |
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