enterprising thief, who thought he'd steal the copper from the rails, between trains, when they are not electrified. His plan might have worked... but for one small detail. He had consulted an out-of-date timetable and the train arrived ten minutes early, putting an electrifying end to his ignoble career. BLOWN AWAY 16 July, 2001, United States | An assistant plant manager made a permanent exit after using an acetylene torch to cut a hole in an asphalt emulsion tank. His plan was to determine the amount remaining in the tank, but his chosen method was in complete disregard of safety procedures and warning signs. When the torch reached the level of the emulsion, the resulting explosion blew him 93 feet away. (CCH Employment Safety & Health Guide No. 1573) THINK BEFORE YOU LEAP 21 July 2001, Idaho | When the brakes failed while driving down a steep mountain road, Marco bailed out on his eight passengers and threw himself from the Dodge van. Too bad he didn't alert the others to the problem before he hit the pavement. Another passenger was able to bring the vehicle to a stop a short distance away. Marco died of a head wound, but no one else was injured. Six more Darwin Awards runners-up coming next week! Meanwhile remember to check out the book at http://www.DarwinAwards.com/book/?0111 --------------------------------------------+---+-+---+-+-+-+-+ Copyright 2001 by Wendy Northcutt www.DarwinAwards.com * Please share this newsletter with your friends! * --- DARWIN AWARDS NEWSLETTER -- 12 November 2001 DARWIN AWARDS commemorate those who chlorinate our gene pool by accidentally removing themselves from it in sublimely idiotic ways. HERE ARE SIX of the 12 Darwin Awards runners-up for the year 2001! See the others at http://www.DarwinAwards.com/?0111 --------------------------------------------+---+-+---+-+-+-+-+ CRYSTAL DAZE Confirmed | Chihuahua, Mexico is home to two caverns containing the largest natural crystals known to man. Some of the clear crystals of selenite are over 20 feet long. The newly-discovered caverns buried 1200 feet below the surface of the earth carry a curse for those who seek to plunder their riches. A man recently tried to steal one of the magnificent crystals from the roof, and might have succeeded... if he hadn't stood directly beneath it while chopping it free. He was was crushed by the sparkling stalactite as it heeded the call of gravity. (Discovery Channel News) http://www.darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin2001-10.html BULLETPROOF? March 2001, Ghana | Tribal clashes in Northern Ghana cause some to resort to witchcraft in the hope of becoming invulnerable to weapons. Sixteen men purchased a potion that would supposedly render them invincible to bullets. After smearing the magical lotion over their bodies, one brave man volunteered to test the spell by standing in a clearing while his compatriots fired upon him... The jujuman who had supplied the defective magic was siezed and beaten for his failure. (Reuters, New Zealand Press) http://darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin2001-15.html SNOWBALL'S CHANCE IN HELL March, Delaware | Two toll collectors involved in a friendly snowball fight decided the match, when one reached out and scooped somesnow from a passing truck. The toll collector's hand caught in the rig, and he was pulled from his booth and dragged to his death. (USA Today) http://www.darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin2001-21.html --------------------------------------------+---+-+---+-+-+-+-+ Read our new book! It's the next evolution in HUMOR. http://www.DarwinAwards.com/book/?0111 --------------------------------------------+---+-+---+-+-+-+-+ INTERSECTING DARWINS 15 April 2001, Tennessee | A Memphis Darwin Award winner trying to beat a train drove around the crossing gates -- only to be struck by an oncoming vehicle whose driver had the same mad plan. The occupants of one vehicle were killed, and the others injured, making this monumental stupidity the first instance of a Darwin Award winner crashing into an Honorable Mention. The accident happened to one side of the tracks, so the train passed by unimpeded. http://www.darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin2001-17.html THAT SINKING FEELING 16 February 2001, Florida | Karla, 32, drowned after driving her car into a 30-foot canal. She could have saved herself, but she refused to listen to the 911 operator who urged her to escape, protesting,"All the water is going to come in!" If you are unlucky enough to find yourself trapped in a sinking car, it is essential to roll down the windows immediately so you can escape from the vehicle. Once your door is even slightly submerged, the water pressure makes it impossible to open. Karla was a strong swimmer and could have paddled to safety, if only she had rolled down her window. (Miami Herald) http://www.darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin1999-52.html SPEED BUMP 8 Aug 2001, Texas | An publican refused further alcoholic drinks to an intoxicated bar patron, a known violent drunk. But he stopped the flow too late. The incensed man hurled a woman to the floor before he was sub- dued by other patrons and ejected from the bar. The authorities were sum- monned to the scene, where they found the unconscious patron imitating a speed bump in the road outside of the bar. (Arlington Star Telegram) http://www.darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin2001-28.html --------------------------------------------+---+-+---+-+-+-+-+ All twelve nominees are waiting for your vote! Visit our website to make sure you choice counts. Vote on the nominees for 2001. --------------------------------------------+---+-+---+-+-+-+-+ Read our new book! It's the next evolution in HUMOR. http://www.DarwinAwards.com/book/?0111 --------------------------------------------+---+-+---+-+-+-+-+ Copyright 2001 by Wendy Northcutt www.DarwinAwards.com * Please share this newsletter with your friends! * ---