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Darwin Awards
A Chronicle of Enterprising Demises
Honoring those who improve the species...by
accidentally removing themselves from it!
June 2008 Culling the Herd.

The Balloon Priest Merits a Darwin Award!

The Balloon Priest
Brazil | A Catholic priest ascended toward heaven on a host of helium party balloons, in homage to Lawn Chair Larry's aerial adventure. Sitting for 19 hours in a lawn chair is not a trivial matter, even in the comfort of your own backyard... Read on.
Kite Surfer
Spain | Storm winds swept across southern Spain, causing widespread flooding and damage to buildings along the Costa Blanca. "Cool," thought one intrepid kite surfer as he packed his gear and hit the beach. Read on.
Loose Change (near miss)
Australia | A 35-year-old man in Sydney lost some change down a stormwater drain. Who would risk his life for some pocket change? A Darwin Award nominee, of course... Read on.
Helmet Head (near miss)
Indiana | At a party near Nashville, a young man was drinking and watching people set off fireworks when a great idea occurred to him. He could improve upon this amateur fireworks display! He put down his drink and set to work... Read on.

Hot-Rod (near miss)
Oregon | A car was hot-rodding down the interstate at speeds exceeding 100 miles per hour. Suddenly the vehicle lost traction, cart-wheeled, narrowly avoided a plunge into the Clackamas River, and smashed through the wall of a garage... Read on.
Robo-Cop (near miss)
Canada | Canadian winter nights are long and usually quiet, but one exception was the night Constable Morgan responded to a drunk driver call. He caught up to the errant driver and fell in behind... Read on.

Gear Differentials and Wheel Rotation

Into the Abyss describes a man with an ingenious idea. He repurposes his tire rim as a makeshift crank. Numerous readers have commented on the mechanics of the differential, and how it applies to this story. What do you think? Read the story, read the comments, join the discussion in the Philosophy Forum.

Within these portals lie 746 "Enterprising Demises." Begin with Darwin Awards, the Near Misses, and Urban Legends. Review the Rules or FAQs or Site Map, or read a random story with a click of the Randomizer button conveniently placed on every page.

18 New Apropos Quotes!

"Just think how stupid the average person is,
and then realize that half of them are even stupider!"
--George Carlin

Changes in Status:

Some true stories are unconfirmed until alert fans supply references. Other stories are labelled "confirmed" but new information reveals I was fooled. And some just shouldn't have been posted. Here are the latest updates:

Removed: Nailed! -- Accident followed by dispair.

Brewery Mishap: Change to Urban Legend

MAYBE REMOVE? Sweet Release Sad, but good safety example. Gun Safety Training - just not that stupid?

Definitely remove:
/stupid/stupid2000-14.html
/stupid/stupid2007-11.html (Miss Near Miss)
/stupid/stupid2006-01.html (Severely Faithful) Gross/crazy

COMBINE: Blondes and Oil Changes & Happy Camper.
COMBINE Roller oaster stories.
Combine spitting contest stories (1, (2))

Literary Reference

"Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious." -Peter Ustinov

Don't miss our mottos!
"Chlorinating the Gene Pool"
"Where Evolution Hits the Pavement"
"Die and Learn"
"The Tree of Life is Self-Pruning"
"Next!"

Wendy "Darwin" Northcutt -- Interviews:
SV Mag > CNN > Salon.com

Making Hash Browns


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