Charles Darwin's Darwin Awards 
HOME
Darwin Awards
Honorable Mentions
Urban Legends
Personal Accounts
Slush Pile
Legends
The Bricklayer
Bizarre Death
Taser Test
Roping a Deer
Unfortunate Husband II
Gerbil Rocket
Overkill I
Raccoon Rocket
Constipated Elephant
The Dog and the Jeep
Man Glued to Rhino Buttocks
Bad Day at the Office
Lobster Vasectomy
Cow Bomb
Misadventure at the Metallica Concert
Gun-Totin' Granny
Hydrogen Beer Disaster
Scuba Divers and Forest Fires
Mad Trombonist
Power Plant Fitness Freak
Frog Giggin' Accident in Arkansas
Breasts Injure Four
Hot Apple Pie
Garden Bomb
Hippo on Dwarf Diet
The Last Supper
Unfortunate Husband
The Smoking Gun
Christmas Roast
Stalled Motorcycle
Falling Urine Deadly
The Laundry was Clean...
Bitter Biter Bit a Nitwit
Drop of a Hat
Puffy Fox Cheeks
Garden Bomb
Romeo and Juliet?
Hedonist Air Pumpers
What's Shakin'?
Dental Calamity
Explosion of Thought
A Medieval Tale
Missionary Miscalculation
Legends 
 
~ Random Story ~
Newsletter
Gift Shop
Rules  Search
Contact Darwin
Submit a Story
Philosophy Forum
Home

  

Darwin Awards
2002 Urban Legends
Email a Friend The following stories are apocryphal. They are included on the Darwin Awards website because they are inspirational narratives of the astounding efforts of legendary Darwin Awards contenders. Next
Prev
Random

Stalled Motorcycle
2002 Urban Legend

(September 2001, Virginia) I work in a motorcycle shop. We see many who have no business being behind two wheels. But the owner of a bike brought in for service really takes the cake.

The entire front end had been ripped off, which is an odd damage pattern. The owner offered the following tale.

He had allowed the motorcycle to sit idle for several months. When he attempted to start it again, the wait had drained the battery. Undeterred, he attempted to bump-start the bike. A manual-transmission vehicle rolling with sufficient speed, popped into second gear, will often start right up, and this is called a bump-start.

The owner lived at the top of a long hill. After a number of repeated and unsuccessful attempts to bump-start the bike, he was left with another problem: a stalled bike sitting at the bottom of a long incline.

The man called his girlfriend to bring her truck and tow the bike back up the hill. A length of rope was procured. One end of the rope was affixed to the truck's bumper, and the other was affixed to the waist of the bike owner "riding" the stalled motorcycle up the hill.

They set off, she in her truck and he on his bike. All was well until he chose to make one final attempt to bump-start the motorcycle. As soon as the clutch engaged, the engine turned into a brake. The bike stopped cold. The owner did not.

His girlfriend was blissfully unaware of what was happening behind her and proceeded to drive to his house, dragging him slowly behind her.

Despite his injuries, he is expected to recover.

DarwinAwards.com © 1994 - 2009
Submitted by: Jack Adams

Awful? 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Great?
Hate it! Love it!
Previous Directions Next

The Darwin Awards Gift Shop

The Darwin Awards: Evolution in Action

Hardback. 327 pages. Autographed.
$15
185 Stories! In the ongoing saga of Survival of the Fittest, meet the thief who steals electrical wires without shutting off the current! Marvel at the would-be pilot who suspends his lawnchair from helium balloons! Learn from the man who peers into a gas can using a cigarette lighter...!

This book also includes a History of the Darwin Awards, Darwin Haiku, and a dozen humorous discussions of the implications of evolution, including the origin of idiots, and the role of testosterone.

Autographed by Author!

 


Advanced Search

HomeRulesFAQsAwardsSlushSite Map
DarwinAward | HonorableMention | PersonalAccount | UrbanLegend