| |
1999 Urban Legends
| The following stories are apocryphal. They are included on the Darwin Awards website because they are inspirational narratives of the astounding efforts of legendary Darwin Awards contenders. |
   |
| ||||||||
Missionary Miscalculation
As it turned out the Reverend Newton Day guessed wrong. The Tuoari tribesmen promptly ate the Reverend Day his wife and his three daughters. Concerned locals said, "We tried to tell him that Tuoaris don't want missionaries. They are perfectly happy worshiping the devil and eating any juicy white man who comes along." "Neighboring tribes say that the preacher and his family were in the stewpot before he ever got his Bible out of his duffel bag," Detective Ike C. Doka reported. "The Tuoaris ate like kings and danced all night long." |
||
|
Submitted by: Gregory Miller Edited by: Jim Watson | ||
 Next
|
Darwin Awards II: Unnatural Selection
Hardback. 240 pages. Autographed.$15 A fresh collection of magnificent misadventures! Lust, Vanity, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, Envy, and Wrath extract an evolutionary toll on the wicked. Salute the owner of an equipment training school who demonstrates the dangers of driving a forklift by failing to survive the filming of his own safety video. Witness the man who becomes a victim of his own strange passion for jumping into rivers. Heed the honest bricklayer who loses a battle of wits with 300 pounds of tools. This book includes more History of the Awards, Gordon's Law, and 10 discussions of evolution, including speciation and the role of verbal memes in civilization. Autographed by Author! |
|
Home |