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The Darwin Awards Gift Shop
Hardback. 240 pages. Autographed.
$15
A fresh collection of magnificent misadventures! Lust, Vanity, Gluttony,
Greed, Sloth, Envy, and Wrath extract an evolutionary toll on the
wicked. Salute the owner of an equipment training school who demonstrates
the dangers of driving a forklift by failing to survive the filming of his
own safety video. Witness the man who becomes a victim of his own strange
passion for jumping into rivers. Heed the honest bricklayer who loses a
battle of wits with 300 pounds of tools.
This book includes more History of the Awards, Gordon's Law, and 10
discussions of evolution, including speciation and the role of verbal memes
in civilization.
Autographed by Author!
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Return to Trees Fails
(18 February 2002, Hawaii) Millennia after an evolving human species descended from the trees, 30-year-old Joshua reversed the process, removing himself from the gene pool while perched in a tree. Joshua had hiked several miles onto a ranch and climbed a Koa tree under cover of darkness, intent upon stealing a branch of the expensive native hardwood. To his credit, he was smarter than a classic cartoon character, and didn't make the mistake of cutting the branch supporting him. However he was not smart enough to avoid cutting a branch directly above his head. The severed branch struck and killed him, and authorities found him still in the tree, twenty feet off the ground.
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