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2008 February Slush
(DA)Chalk one up for the dog.
(?)Seatbelt subterfuge kills driver
(?)Mamba kills Man
(DA)Slip Sliding Away
(Hmmm)Surfing the wrong wave
(DA)A Breathtaking View
(HM)Mexican Divorce
DA:Dynamite Defroster
(DA)Stabbing suspect dies in car crash
Fatal Ski Slope Prank
(?)Die Hard
(DA)Chemistry Went Over Her Head
(>)Living the High Life (On a Budget)
(DA)On the Piste
(?)Darwin in heavy traffic
(?)Winched up
(No)Swimming with the fish (bits)
Man died after driving down boat ra
Monk killed by own runaway lawnmowe
Up, Up, and Away!
(DA)Hare today, gone tomorrow
Top of the train
Killer locomotive
A good thought gone bad
(HM)Shock Horror
Inspiration + Youth + Explosives =
Brain Evacuation
Manhole kills man, Dove in for Cana
Bridges are lower than they appear
no diving please
Roping a Bobcat
Mattress Race
Just Say No
Man has friend shoot him to get off
Old shells never die
Wash those genes away
BASE jumper succumbs to stupidity
A Mattress of Life and Death....
(DA)4 Die In Dirtbike Collision
boat welding
Trail Blazing Gaffe
It only works in the movies
feeling tyred - near miss
Tram drags man with him
Tree felling made easy
Community service for teen who burn
If at first you don't succeed
Man dies trying to beat train in Sa
The $500 Bullet
Please Take This Outside
Trailer burns when woman uses gas t
Death by iPod?
BBQ Whippits
Two men burned in backyard blast
Sledding Accident
The Widow Maker
Redneck Bee Exterminator
Miner nearly crushes himself
Too Close For Comfort
A fool and his bike
Drain Surfing
arrange your own hit
A tough act to swallow for student
Grocery Bang!
Drove 2.5 miles on the wrong way
2 teens hurt by explosion while dri
Departing parted
I'm dying for a drink
Smoking related near miss
Smoky bar triggered fatal asthma at
Man's death linked to cotton swab u
putting your foot in it
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2008 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

Slip Sliding Away

2008 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

Wendy says, "Accepted into the Archive."


ORIGINAL SUBMISSION:

(from my archives, 30 years in the ER. You cannot make these up).

Every year, in the late fall and early winter months, snow covered mountains become infested with hunters. One ambitious pair climbed high up the mountain in search of their quarry.

The trail crossed a small glacier that had crusted over. The lead hunter had to stomp a foot-hold into the snow, one at a time in order to cross the glacier.

About the middle of the glacier, the foot stomp hit not snow, but a rock. The lead hunter lost his footing and fell.

Down the crusty glacier he zipped, off the edge and out of sight.

His companion watched him slide away. After a while, he shouted "are you ok?" "Yes!" came the answer.

Reasoning it was a quick way to get off the glacier, the second hunter plopped down and accelerated down the glacier.

There, just over the edge of the glacier was his friend. Holding onto the top of a tree that just barely protruded from the snow.

As the second hunter shot past the first, he uttered his final epitaph. There were no other tree tops nearby. Only the 100 foot drop, onto the rocks, where he exited this world.

Darwin notes, "We all wanted to know, what was that final epitaph? In February 2009, I contacted the MD, who said, "Sorry, I'm helping out in Port Au Prince, Haiti and do not have my files. As I recall, the word was the F word, or very similar. I get these second-hand from the investigating officers who call me in as a medical examiner. As I did not specifically state the word, I'm sure it is one that even today my mother would soap my mouth should she hear me say it!"

Submitted on 02/08/2008

Submitted by: Anonymous
Reference:

Copyright © 2008 DarwinAwards.com

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>> Moderator Scores <<

Bruce said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
What I'd like to know is how that first hunter managed to get out of that precarious situation. Thanks for another humorous story!


James said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
Did his final epitaph sound something like "AAAAAAAGGGGGGGHHhhhhhh...BLAP!"? A truly funny story which I gather you got from the survivor (who probably had to be rescued). Thanks!


The Darwin Awards Gift Shop

The Darwin Awards: Evolution in Action

Hardback. 327 pages. Autographed.
$15
185 Stories! In the ongoing saga of Survival of the Fittest, meet the thief who steals electrical wires without shutting off the current! Marvel at the would-be pilot who suspends his lawnchair from helium balloons! Learn from the man who peers into a gas can using a cigarette lighter...!

This book also includes a History of the Darwin Awards, Darwin Haiku, and a dozen humorous discussions of the implications of evolution, including the origin of idiots, and the role of testosterone.

Autographed by Author!

 

 

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