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2006 January Slush
(DA)Sudden Stop
(HM)Money or your life?
(?)Sleepy-Time Highway
(DA)Mauled Mugger
(?)Gristle Grind in Pandora
(?)On the road, Sleeping drunk, o
Greedy fuel station owner
One Man's Rubbish...
buffers and fumes dont mix
Clean up chemist
Just Sleep On It
Petrol in Washing Machines
Mousetrap x 2
Brake Fluid for a Toothache?
I said, "GET OUT OF BED!!"
Fire Extinguishers Don't Work
Door to Door Tattoos Sold
McKinley Roll
Giving the fingers
Artist Binds Feet in Desert, L
Toll avoidance
Heart Ablaze
Dumb Kayaker Defeated By Falls
honourable mention jetskier
(PA) Yes, it will explode!
Janitor burns up plane
Keen fishermen
Careful with that gun, Eugene
Escalator Jumping
Snow camping - the wrong place
Neighborly Revenge Backfired
Christmas Fire
Holy men - the army
hunting or the hunted?
Jet Engines Really Suck
The hammer or the nail?
Graduation Elation
The Keg Raft
Grumpy Old Men 3
Taxi driver hitting the road
Ski instructor's warning backf
Fire, Fire, Fire
Sleeping under Snowblowers
Man trapped jump-starting car
Man OK After Falling 130 Feet
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Darwin Awards
2006 Slush Pile

This item was recently submitted by a reader.
Should I include it in the archive?
Vote to tell me what *you* think!

Clean up chemist

2006 Reader Submission
Pending Acceptance

We hired a man at our shop to clean RVs and the shop. Not being a job to attract the cream of the crop in the smarts and ability catagories we assigned and explained what was expected of him on every job. We have a true arsenal of cleaning supplies and when I went over the saftey brief on using cleaning chemicals he impaitently told me "my momma was a maid and I grew up helping her" and he "knew all about" cleansers.

Irritated I assigned him his first job, cleaning the restroom in the shop. Now if any of you have ever been in a shop bathroom you know it is, well let us say, abused as often as not.

I was in my office when I hear a crash from the direction of the restroom. Getting up to see what my brillant employee had broke I walked back and found him nearly passed out, gagging and puking. Noticing an odor I held my breath and pulled him out the door to fresh air.

It seems my self proclaimed expert had decided the sudsing ammonia alone would not be enough to clean the toilet so he also poured straight bleach on top of it.

I'd like to nominate him for an honorable meantion at this time, although I'm sure he will eventually get to earn his full reward.

Submitted on 01/07/2006

Submitted by: Scott Jenkins
Reference: Personal Account

Copyright © 2006 DarwinAwards.com

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James said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
I feel your frustration. What our "rocket scientist" discovered the hard way was how to make chlorine gas...yes, the SAME POISON GAS first used at the Battle of Ypres in 1915. In the end, you saved him from a lingering and very painful death, though as you said he'll probably succeed in bringing such an end on himself in due course. Hopefully, it won't be on your watch! :-) Definite keeper as a PA!


Greg said:
Definitely Keep: Personal Account
LOL! The fact he waived the safety briefing makes this story. Thanks.


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Hardback. 327 pages. Autographed.
$15
185 Stories! In the ongoing saga of Survival of the Fittest, meet the thief who steals electrical wires without shutting off the current! Marvel at the would-be pilot who suspends his lawnchair from helium balloons! Learn from the man who peers into a gas can using a cigarette lighter...!

This book also includes a History of the Darwin Awards, Darwin Haiku, and a dozen humorous discussions of the implications of evolution, including the origin of idiots, and the role of testosterone.

Autographed by Author!

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